How long would it take for men to discover my potential?

"Do you have a boyfriend?" Virginia asked me the other day when I was on the way to her apartment.

I sucked in my breath. And I think my answer sounded like a sigh.

"No," I said simply, dreading the conversation that was to follow.

"Why not?"

I shrugged.

I saw her nod to herself out of the corner of my eye.

"Don't you worry. Men took some time to discover my potential," she said cheerfully as I dropped her off at the guardhouse.

I did some thinking on the way back to the office.

Virginia is very attractive. She is also in her 40s.

I groaned to myself.

I want to be attractive now.

I don't think I want men to discover my potential only when I'm in my 40s.

Drown with Me - The Video

Finally.

I present you, Drown with Me - the video, by Fallen Leaves.

*applause*

Singing in the shower

I came home smiling on Tuesday after our Earthquake session.

I was surprised I was happy.

I was almost myself that day. Almost. Save for that bad limp I have.

I could laugh at you. I could laugh with you.

I could finally look at you in the eye and not have tears threatening to drown us both.

I asked if I could have a go on the swing. I had been avoiding it for months.

So many things I wanted to tell you, so many things. And they had nothing to do with wanting you back.

Because you see, I sang in the shower when I came home that night.

I picked up all the stuff you gave me over the year. Little things. Put them away in a box.

I flipped through the camera manual that you returned to me. My camera manual, not ours, just because we used the same model. Mine.

I deleted the SMS you sent me that afternoon, something about you calling me later. Can't remember.

And then it struck me.

I knew I was over you.

CNY 2006 Penang Road Trip Pt. 4

I want to go back where the sun shines and the waves roll and the jellyfishes sting.

If you get wet, you'll get sick

If you get wet, you'll get sick.

I found this picture online. It made me smile to myself.

If I get wet, I'll get sick.

I know, because you said that to me a long time ago.

I remember that day.

When we were both caught in the rain and I was wearing a white top and slippers and you tried to shield me from the rain, albeit feebly, with 2 hands.

"What are you doing?" I asked as I wiped raindrops from my eyes.

"If you get wet, you'll get sick," you said to me.

"But your hands won't help when it's a storm," I argued.

"Alright," you said, "let's make a run back to the car, then."

I was smiling inwardly then.

Those 2 seconds of your hands over my head felt like a millenia to me.

True, I was still cold and shivering by the time we made it back to the car.

But I remember till today, that if I get wet, I'll get sick.

Because it didn't matter to you then, that you will be the one who'll be sick if you get wet.

That was such a long time ago.

My first speaking part

"Do you know," Virginia began as I brought my car to a halt at the traffic lights in Phileo Damansara, "that many actresses in Hollywood take many years before they get a speaking part?"

I nodded quietly.

"And here you are, your first commercial and you've got lines!" she squealed.

"But, Virginia, the commercial is..." I said.

"For panty napkins. I know," she said matter-of-factly.

Yay~

My baby's back from a one week trip in Cambodia/Vietnam~

*I was referring to my camera. Wtf did you think it was?

Crap!

It's 2 days to shoot and I sprained my ankle this morning.

Saffron is Miss June

It's not June yet, but I'm itching to showcase my 2 seconds of fame.


So remember to ask them for the calendar the next time you make an order, alright?

I'd rather be full of shit

I was out for sup kambing with Leonard the other day.

And I brought up the subject of being the butt of skinny jokes.

So I said, "I know why I'm still skinny. It's because I shit everyday. So my body doesn't absorb anything important enough for me to get fat."

With all seriousness, he looked at me and asked, "So you're saying you'd rather be full of shit is it?"

"..."

Me-me

Because I was bored and decided to check out Julian's blog, now I have to do this silly me-me.

Hey, it rhymes!

Details, details and more details

Nicknames: Auntie, Sor Poh, Piggy
B-day: 20th February
Age: 23
Sex: Female
Where do you live: At home
Pets: I wish
Zodiac Sign: Pisces
Righty or Lefty: I can smoke with either one
Hair color: Black with donno-what-color faded streaks
Hair length: Short
Eye color: Dark brown
Height: 5 feet something, 4 I think

Do you wear contacts or glasses?: Always contacts when on shoot, glasses in the office
Do you have any piercings?: 3 on my right ear, 2 on my left ear and one on my nose
Do you have a tattoo?: Yes, a palm-sized tribal dragon on my lower left back
Do you wear any rings?: Nada
Do you have a certain fashion you follow?: My own

Current News...

How are you today?: Dying of abdominal cramps
What pants are you wearing right now?: Shorts from FOS
What shirt are you wearing right now?: Some old tee I got for 10 bucks
What does your hair look like at the moment?: Unkempt
What song are you listening to right now?: OST Cinema Paradiso
What was the last thing you ate?: Prawns
Last person you talked to on the phone?: Kamil
Last Dream you can remember: I was visibly pregnant with donno-who's kid and I'm supposed to marry some other guy that I don't even know
Who are you talking to right now?: The voices in my head
What are the last four digits of your phone number?: 7300

Random Stuff..

If you were a crayon, what color would you want to be?: Yellow
What CD are you going to buy next?: I haven't bought a CD in years
What's the best advice ever given to you?: Tomorrow will be a better day
What are your future goals?: Marry a rich man =)
Do you like to dance?: I look like I'm having fits
Worst sickness you ever had?: A couple of weeks ago when I had an appendicitis scare
What's the stupidest thing you've ever done?: Forgetting to switch my headlights off last night
If you could change one thing about yourself what would it be?: Stupid temper
Where do you shop the most?: Carrefour for my sushi and chocolates

Even more random stuff...

How many kids do you want to have?: A few
Son's name: Tristan
Daughter's name: No idea yet
Do you do drugs?: Not unless they've been prescribed
Do you drink?: Drink what?
What kind of shampoo and conditioner do you use?: V05
What sport do you hate the most?: Wrestling, the kind they show on TV
How many TV's do you have in your house?: One
Do you have your own?: No
Your own phone line?: One for work and another for play
Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?: My stuffed dog named Patrick
Have you ever broken/sprained/fractured a bone?: Nothing broken but plenty sprained
Who do you dream about?: Family mostly, but I occasionally dream of friends and some random people I've never met

Are you Romantic?

Do you believe in Love?: Yes
Do you have a girlfriend or boyfriend?: An imaginary one
Do you have a crush?: Yes
Do you believe in Love at first sight?: Applies to babies and small animals only
Where would you like to go on your honeymoon?: Rome
What song do you want played at your wedding?: Butterfly Kisses by Bob Carlisle
What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?: His smile
Are you shy to ask someone out?: Ahbutthen
Who do you want to spend the rest of your life with?: You know, that one

Girls on Guys (Girls only, unless you're gay or something.)
*I find these questions extremely pointless

Boxers or briefs: Boxers
Curly or straight hair: Bald
Tall or short: Tall
Six pack or muscular arms: Washboard abs
Good or bad guys: *rolls eyes*
Ears pierced or not: Does it matter?
Tan or no tan: Tan, definitely
Dimples or not: Yes, please
Stubble or neatly shaven: Look good alright already lah *exasperated*
Rugged or sporty: James Deans to jocks
Studly or cutie: Refer to the answer above
Accent or not: Italian, please
Smart or dumb: You think?
What sports should he play?: He should be a swimmer <3
Dependent (whipped) or independent?: I don't want a pet

Guys on Girls (Guys only, unless you like to fondle tofu)

Sandals or thongs:
Painted nails or not:
Regular or sports bra:
Bra straps showing or not:
Cute n' mysterious or wild n' sexy:
smart or dumb:
Dark or blonde hair:
Long or short hair:
Curly or straight hair:
Dark, light, or crazy cool eyes:
Long or short nails:
Hat or no hat:
Good or bad girl:
Hair up or down:
Jewellery or none:
Tall or short:
Accent or no accent:
Pants or dress:
Tan or fair:
Freckles or none:
Shy or outgoing:
Talkative or quiet:
Pretty indoor chick or crazy party chick:

Choices, choices...

Lights on/off: Always off
Sun or rain?: Sun for a tan and rain for curling up indoors with a book
Do you like scary or happy movies better?: I like old school scary movies
On the phone or in person?: In person
Paper or plastic?: Paper
Summer or winter?: I'm so kampung that I've never experienced winter
Hugs or kisses?: Hugs make all the bad things go away
Chocolate or white milk: Both
Half empty or half full?: Depending on the day
CD or DVD: What kind of pointless question is this?
Vanilla or Chocolate?: If it's ice cream, it doesn't matter
Skiing or Boarding: I'm so kampung I haven't tried either
Day or night: I can frolick at the beach any time of the day
Sunset or sunrise: They make equally good pictures

Favourites...

Colours: White, black, green
Food: Chinese
Fast Food: Is not like fast food at all
Ice Cream Flavor: Butterscotch
Sport?: Swimming
Animal: Dog
Music?: Alternative, post-rock, emo
Song: If You Sleep - Tal Bachman
Band: OasisCranberriesEverclear <--- that's one band
Number: 2
Actor or Actress?: Sean Penn, Monica Bellucci
TV show: I don't watch TV
Clothes Brand: Topshop for their tanks and Levi's for their jeans Saying: Ha?

Confess thy sins..

Gotten Drunk?: A long time ago when I was still stupid
Broke the law?: Who hasn't?
Ran from the cops?: What for?
Tried to kill yourself?: Yeah, but I chickened out
Made yourself throw up?: Only when I had food poisoning or when I'm drunk
Been in love?: *sigh*
Made yourself cry to get out of trouble?: I cry all the time
Did/Said something to hurt someone?: Always

Reach out and Tag someone...

1. Quant
2. Meng
3. Melvyn
4. Swee Ping
5. The people who have nothing to blog about
   

Hujan ais!

I was happily surfing eBay when the rain got too deafening for my liking.

Yes, it's a storm outside, I know.

But the noise is getting a bit impolite.

And then my maid comes running out.

"Hujan ais!"

I ran to my backyard.

Holy.

It was raining ice.

Little blobs of ice were bouncing off the grass in the midst of the heavy rain.

I watched for a few minutes.

Then I got bored.

This isn't the first time anyway.

*I would've taken a picture, but at the rate they were melting, I'd just get my camera wet.

Random Picture Pt.1

I just felt like putting up a random picture.

*sigh* I miss the eMac. It was practically mine.

CNY 2006 Penang Road Trip Pt. 3

I just found them in my camera.

I swear I didn't take these pictures.

This is what happens when you're the only one who has a camera with 10x optical zoom and you're off frolicking in the sun by yourself.

I started this blog

There was a time, long before I moved to blogspot.com, that I took the anonymity for granted.

I could talk about anything at all.

Because the people who read my blog didn't know me.

Of late, self-censorship is beginning to sound like a dirty word to me.

I don't know how many drafts I have in here, never finished, never published.

Because I'm afraid of the people who visit my blog.

The people who know me, those who have seen me smile.

The ones who know what makes me tick.

The ones who know which buttons to push to open the floodgates.

The same group of people who know exactly what a drama queen I am.

And the weird thing is, I can't be completely honest with these people.

I can't write about what makes my heart bleed, or what exactly it was that so-and-so did to me at work.

Because they read my blog.

The world is a Friendster.

And I don't want their sympathy.

I started a blog because I wanted to rant.

This blog has long outlived its purpose.

Album cover

There was once last year I was messing around with my camera and taking pictures of myself. And I took this once picture that I kinda liked and then started messing around with it on Photoshop.

I showed it to Kevin.

He said it looked like an album cover.

And he gave me this.

Thanks.